Yours For The Basking

Why is it that the most thrilling, most exhilarating, most delightful experiences that show up in our lives . . . the experiences that feel like direct answers to our prayers, astonishingly perfect replies from the Universe to something we’ve been asking for . . . often become the source of such stress or worry?

I’ve been hearing phrases like “looking a gift horse in the mouth” or “borrowing trouble” or “waiting for the other shoe to drop” for most of my life. But lately I’ve been recognizing in particularly powerful ways how much I am guilty of doubting or questioning or otherwise refusing to let myself just enjoy the incomparable gifts of the Universe when they are offered to me.

I notice how often I start to scrutinize something wonderful that has come my way. I start to ‘think’ about it and to put it under a microscope to see what it’s made of or what makes it tick. I will start compiling a list of questions, or I will begin to weigh it against some pre-existing list of criteria . . . Or I might just simply stand back, tapping my foot, and waiting for the less than lovely or lovable ‘truth’ to reveal itself.

In other words, I find ways to sabotage my joy. I introduce doubt into the equation and it immediately starts to snowball, and before you know it . . . I’ve neatly fulfilled my self-fulfilling prophecy and the inherent problems that I was so diligently looking for begin to appear like clockwork.

So I asked The Shower Team . . . Why do I seem so compelled to go looking for the worm in the beautiful apple? Why am I so driven to find the trouble lurking in the shadows of even the brightest blessing that shows up at my door?

Perhaps the easiest or clearest way that we can respond to this question is to say that the reason you so often experience this “other shoe” dropping—and therefore start to expect it—is because you’ve really got the whole happiness and hardship business completely backwards.

You train yourselves—rather unintentionally of course—to view hardship or suffering or difficulty or struggle as the normal course of things—and happiness you tend to view as a fluke or an anomaly or some glitch in the natural order. Even those among you who claim to be “optimists” are still guilty of buying into the view that your life experience is, by some cosmic or “Divine” mandate, ordained to be an arbitrary mix of what you perceive to be “good” or “bad”.

Fresh from the womb you begin hearing the hype about how life is hard, work is hard, relationships are hard . . . anything worth having is hard . . . rewards only come to those who try really hard. It’s no wonder you find it so HARD to believe that anything worthwhile or anything truly wonderful can only come about through hard effort, that there can be no gain without pain.

It’s a wonder you ever give yourselves a minute of peace or joy considering the degree and frequency with which you are always on standby, waiting for the bad news, waiting for things to go wrong, waiting for the good times to pass, waiting for the other side of the coin . . . your list of ways for describing this expectation is nearly endless.

You’ve convinced yourselves that the law of the Universe is one of equal parts (if you’re lucky) good and bad, equal parts happy and sad, equal parts ease and hardship . . . You’ve so bought into the notion that things cannot be wonderful for long, that things cannot keep getting better and better, that you cannot receive something wonderful without it costing you something . . . that it is extremely difficult for you to entertain any other way of looking at things.

And so, you continue on your way, believing, expecting—and therefore receiving—your mixed bag of goodies . . . your wormy apples, your up-and-down life experiences . . . and with each one, you nod your heads and agree together that this is just the way it is on Planet Earth and the best we can do is try to console each other and wait for the next upswing.

There is, in fact, nothing terribly wrong with that approach. Even with that mixed message you are sending the Universe and the mixed results you are receiving in return, things still go amazing well for you overall. And the ‘worst’ thing—for most of you—is that you die and pass back into pure bliss. Hardly an unhappy ending to your current experience.

But we would offer to you that there is an easier way. There is a way that you can tip the odds in your favor . . . a way that you can start to skew your life experience toward the happy and the joyful and the easy and the delightful. There is a way that you can begin to create more and more good stuff and invite less and less of what you consider to be bad.

It’s really rather simple—you just start upping the enjoyment. You know how to do this. All of you have moments now and then when something fabulous has come your way. You got a piece of rip-roaring good news. You got a promotion or an award or a raise or a new mate or a new toy or a new friend . . . Something awesome happened to you and you just couldn’t get enough of thinking about it. So you replayed it over and over in your mind. You relived the details, you rewound the tape and played it again and again. You let yourself enjoy that experience repeatedly and you loved every extended minute of it.

You know how to prolong your joy. You know how to keep giving yourself good feelings by virtue of your attention to the thoughts that give rise to them. You know how to take your mind off whatever is not so hot in your daily experience and to turn it toward something that really floats your boat. And as you continue to do this . . . with more and more situations, more and more often, with more and more abandon and shameless pleasure coming from the sheer savoring of something sweet that you’ve tasted . . . you are in effect, rewiring yourself to receive more of that sweet- tasting abundance from the Universe. You are in effect teaching yourself how to feel better and better and as you feel better and better you are opening yourself up to more and more of what makes you feel better and better and you are in effect rewriting the script that you’ve learned and practiced and the new script is one where you get to have not one, not two or three but unlimited happy endings.

You can choose to continue seeing your life experience as a series of random, some-happy, some-sad events, all following some higher power’s presumably wiser direction . . . You can choose to see yourselves as fated to fall as often as you stand, to fail as often as your succeed, to cry out in pain or sorrow as often as you rejoice . . . That’s your choice. But you have other choices available to you—and in the making of those other choices, you have other perspectives and other kinds of life experiences available to you.

You can keep your sorrows coming because you believe them to be inevitable. Or you can test those waters and by savoring and prolonging and reliving and recreating and even insisting upon better and better, happier and happier, sweeter and sweeter experiences . . . you can astonish yourself with the extent to which the Universe is waiting to deliver to you untold, unimagined, and unconditional bliss to you—even before you kick the bucket. Just as the sorrows, the disappointments, the failures, the losses, the letdowns are yours for the asking . . . the delights, the surprises, the unspeakably exhilarating joys and satisfactions are yours for the basking.

I haven’t come this close to bursting into a refrain of the “Hallelujah Chorus” since I lost my virginity. And that was followed by such a self-imposed stab of guilt that it only seems to prove the Team’s point here.

As a writer and a poet in particular, I have embraced as much or more than anyone the view that our lives are by nature or by definition or by decree, an avoidable, unpredictable mix of ups and downs, highs and lows, good and bads. And as I sit with the message from The Team, I don’t so much hear them saying that the variety or contrast of our life experiences is ‘bad’ . . . only that we have far more say in how it all goes than we let ourselves believe.

I love basking. I can keep myself on cloud nine for days at a time just by reliving some particularly fine moment that made me feel oh so good to be me. If by giving myself more of those moments, I can literally create more of those moments—and in some measure at least, minimize or modify my belief that those moments must eventually flip flop into something that hurts . . . what a gift I’ve given me.

It seems there’s very little to lose by giving basking more air time. Who knows how impressively free of hardship my life could become. I’m already jealous of the happier me I could be—and that leaves me feeling like wallowing in my satisfaction for a while longer—and for the moment, complete.


About Dan

Published novelist, poet, essayist, copywriter, photographer and college educator. Visit me at

Posted on January 13, 2008, in Abundance, Channeling, Creating Your Own Reality, Deliberate Creating, Empowerment, Joyful Living, Law of Attraction, Manifesting, Prosperity, Self Development, Well being. Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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