Monthly Archives: July 2007

If you’re sick of hearing about my dreams you may want to sleep through at least the first part of this installment.

What can I say? I’m a Pisces, so I like dreamin’ but I don’t like bad dreams any more than the next sleeper. And sometimes they’re just plain bad. Unpleasant. Ugly. Yucky. It especially bugs me when they seem to show up out of nowhere for no apparent good reason when I am otherwise feeling pretty good overall about my waking life. They can hit like a bucket of cold water in my face, and linger into my morning way past my cups of coffee.

So I wanted to hear what was up with that from The Shower Team. More specifically, I wanted to know the best way for me to respond to a bad dream so that it doesn’t rain on what could otherwise be a perfectly sunny day?

We would—at the risk of completely knocking you on your rear—respond to such dreams, which are manifestations of fears or worries still active in your vibration, by saying things such as: “Thank you thank you!” We would be so audacious as to urge you to say “Thank you!” to the constructive contrast that such images and feelings provide for you, for in the face of that contrast even greater clarity can emerge.

When faced with the fears or doubts or anxieties experienced in such dreams, the part of you that is really You becomes the more confident, more fearless, more determined you that you want to be. As you observe these highly contrasting experiences, you form an even more powerful sense of what you want—of the greater certainty and the greater confidence and the greater faith and the greater expressions of support that you want to see and to feel. You conclude even more strongly what it is that you desire and as a result, you summon even more powerful life force through you to move in the direction of those desires.

So rather than crawling into a corner or curling into a fetal position or pulling the covers over your head, we would encourage you to celebrate these dreams. Applaud the contrast you’ve observed and felt, rather than wracking your brain to decipher the ‘hidden meaning’ and then feel the determination born out of your even stronger desires. This is one challenge we would love to see you accept—to feel the greater life force that is summoned to you through these contrasting experiences. The same applies to similar, waking experiences—the ones you often say are “like a bad dream”. We would want you to accept the challenge to feel the stronger or happier or more confident or more purposeful or more successful you that You always become the moment that you become aware of what you want—and what you don’t want.

Accept the challenge to be that You who has benefited from the increased or intensified desire. Allow your allowing of what you want to be fueled even more by the contrasting experiences and even try to appreciate those experiences, conscious or unconscious ones, for that additional energy propelling you toward your desires.

Whatever form the contrast may take, practice turning where you stand and saying, “Thank you” . . . “Thank you, ex-lover for dumping me so that I can become this Me who can receive so much more from someone else” . . . “Thank you, ex-boss, for firing me so that I am free to find work that is more aligned with my dreams”. . .

As we offer this to you we recognize that you may not be in a place where you can feel the value of what we are suggesting. In fact we may sound like we are full of. . . it. But we promise you, as you allow yourself to experience appreciation for the events in your life that give birth to your dreams and desires, as you see the cycle, the perfect connection between the variety of your experience and the continual emerging of new and stronger preferences, you will see the beauty in this process. And as you can feel and express that appreciation, you will move more and more easily and swiftly into alignment with what you really want. You will probably sleep better, too.

I was thinking maybe just put a crystal under my pillow or something, but noooo. For some bizarre reason I’m remembering an old TV commercial with a much younger Cher as spokesperson for a chain of fitness centers. I remember her saying in the ad, “If a beautiful body came in a bottle we’d all have one.”

I’m starting to sort of get this idea that there’s something about the inspiration and motivation that comes from seeing or experiencing something we don’t like. Much as we don’t like it, often something we really do like comes from noticing what we don’t like.

Trying to sort through what I just said leaves me feeling like there just might be something good about bad dreams. And that leaves me feeling a little wider awake and for the moment, a bit more complete.

I’ve always been really irritated by platitudes. Perky pep talks can just annoy the hell out of me when I’m already aggravated about something or fixated on some prickly frustration the way we can’t seem to leave a scab alone or stop running our tongues over a sensitive tooth.

So of course, The Shower Team just loves to chime in sometimes with the kind of message that they know I tend to resist sharing. It’s this great game we have going on.

Nevertheless, I recently found myself yet again pondering the merits of what we often refer to as positive thinking . . . and more specifically, the idea that we can and should forget about telling it like it is and focus on telling it like we want it to be, if only to ourselves.

Even as we begin to offer this to you, we can feel the tide of resistance in you swelling. We can hear the groans and moans and see the eyes rolling about yet another mouthful of sickly sweet Pollyanna Bismo. We can see and feel how hard it is for you take this advice . . . and once again your resistance is mostly about your belief—your frequently practiced thoughts—about being realistic and facing facts and not burying your head in the sand or not sticking your head in the clouds or not keeping your head up your ass.

And with regard to all those alternatives, we say . . . thumb your nose at them all you want . . . scorn or ridicule the notion of focusing on the positive aspects until you are (literally) blue in the face, and you will still ultimately prove us right. You can hold yourself in bad humor. You can focus on the ugly facts (and no one is disputing that they are sometimes ugly). You can face the unpleasantness you often call “reality” and you can dig in your heels and refuse to budge from your surly vantage point and in spite of all that determined and self-defeating effort you will still end up kicking the bucket and passing back into the bliss, the pure positive energy and the well being that was there and available to you all along. And then no one will be laughing harder than you at the fuss you made over the “facts” (we’re already getting quite a kick out of it).

Why postpone the inevitable joy? Why hold on to your view of what you don’t like and wish were different when you could begin to enjoy the satisfaction available to you here and now by simply choosing to focus on the best aspects of where you are, the best aspects of what you are doing, the best aspects of who you are with?

Often you will say, “But I don’t want to keep this thing going. I don’t want to stay here where I am or stay with this loser I’m with . . .” and you worry that by making the best of where you are, you will somehow perpetuate that undesired situation—all the while missing the point that what you really want is to feel good. You want a different job because you think it will make you feel good. You want more bucks in the bank because you think it will make you feel good. You want a cuter, sweeter, kinder, smarter, sexier, etc. partner because you think it will make you feel good. Seeing a pattern here?

And yet you continue to insist that things change so you can feel good while we continue to tell you to feel good so that things can change. And we’re right back where we always start with you in this process. So at the risk of repeating ourselves again and again, we would really REALLY like to see you just try our approach. Make it an experiment.

Start your day by taking a few minutes to decide—maybe even write down—how you are going to make the best of that day, or how you are going to make the best of some particular situation. And then do what you decided to do. Follow through and then throughout the day, continuously remind yourself to make the best of wherever you are or whatever you are doing in whatever way that you can. At the end of the day, notice (again perhaps in writing) what you liked or enjoyed or appreciated most about that day. Try it for a week or better yet, for a month or two or three. Make it your “Feeling Better Lab” and at the end of the experience, take note of what changed for you.

You’ve explored the potential for making the worst of things. You’ve given that a royal go and made yourself pretty proficient at it. Apparently you are less than thrilled with the results. So why not try it from the other point of view? Why not just see how it goes for you when you make up your mind that you are genuinely, diligently going to make the best and forget the rest . . .

Our promise to you is that if you make this your sincere approach even for a relatively short period of time, you will be awed by the results. You won’t believe how your life will begin to improve. You will be shocked at how good you start to feel—assuming you’re into that sort of thing . . .

I have to admit this brings out the mad scientist in me. Leave it to the Team to step skillfully past my objections to platitudes and to basically dare me to feel better. Maybe it’s my Mercury in Aries but I could never resist a good mental challenge. I’ll show Them/Me.

I’m already plotting about which crappy conditions to make the best of (Note to Self: Rephrase “crappy conditions”). That leaves me feeling both a little twisted—and for the moment, determinedly complete.